"The secure attachment is the one that suits our society." Interview with the psychologist Teresa García

We parents ask ourselves, logically, what behavior we should have to help our children grow up happy, emotionally healthy and responsible. One of the keys to this is in the attachment and also in the advice I receive from the professionals of child psychology.

To clarify the types of attachment and parental behaviors that create them we will interview the child psychologist Teresa García today, director of the cabinet without punishment.

Does a psychologist's training prepare you to understand children's emotional development well?

In witch university? I do not know the curricula of all Spanish universities. At UNED, where I studied, there were contradictory subjects.

In "evolutionary" you tell the stages of a person's life, and what can be expected at each stage, of course the first stages are included. But later, methods that do not respect the expectations of a child in the early stages of their formation are explained. However, we talk about physical training, not emotional training.

What subjects are included in the career that discuss the child's emotional needs and attachment?

In my career at least I didn't find subjects that talked about emotional needs. Of attachment yes, the one I named in the previous question, "evolutionary".

When therapies are studied, is this approach included, or is fundamentally talk of behavioral or cognitive-behavioral therapies?

Again it depends on the university in which you study, in the uned the approach is cognitive-behavioral, and I understand that it is the general trend in Spain.

Is attachment so important in children's emotional development?

Statistics show that the type of attachment that develops in the first months and years of life, is manifested in the type of life that the person will have. The type of social relationships you will develop. So much so that it correlates with work, marriage or friendships chosen by the person.

What does secure attachment imply?

More than what it implies, I prefer to say what distinguishes it from other types of attachment. When a child has a secure attachment, he investigates what is around him at some distance from his mother, or reference person. If he meets a stranger (Mary Ainworth's experiments) he expresses stress, but as soon as his reference person appears, he receives comfort from her and manages to calm down.

Is it then natural for a baby to cry if it is attended by someone who is not their primary caregiver?

Keep in mind that we are biologically dependent on others in the first years of life. Our current civilization is relatively young. And being away from your primary caregiver literally implies death.

Not in our culture, but biologically we do not "know." The baby that kicks more and makes more noise, is more likely to be treated, in nature at least. And the human race is not outside of nature. What is not natural is that a baby does not cry when he is treated by a stranger or stranger.

What happens when a baby is treated sometimes and sometimes not?

We develop our consciousness based on what is repeated in our lives. So when there is no clear scheme, since the caregiver is sometimes and sometimes not, it is difficult for a baby to make his life predictable.

In these stages when life is not predictable, biologically it is dangerous, so the baby tends to develop a behavior of fear and protection. As he has no record of what is coming next, he will be constantly looking for a safe scheme. That can manifest itself as a constant search for attention. This type of behavior develops a type of attachment, labeled as disorganized.

And when the primary caregiver treats the baby with violence (does not care for him, screams, hits or punishes him)?

In this particular case there is a relatively clear scheme for the baby. You need to escape the violence. It also develops continuous stress. Let's say that in the previous case the baby does not know what comes next. In this case, what does he know, but it generates anxiety and fear of pain, although in this case it is predictable pain. In these cases, avoidance attachment is usually developed.

Do the child's different forms of attachment relate to the relationships that person develops in adulthood?

The correlation in this regard is quite clear. Sure attachment, it has a positive relationship with professional and social "success", while it has a negative relationship with mental illness.

While the other two types I've named correlate positively with mental and psychosomatic illnesses, and negative with that success.

The probability suggests that the secure attachment is the one that suits our society, both for social success and for saving resources in social and clinical services
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But, knowing this, what makes many psychologists advise techniques or care that imply lack of attention to a baby who demands it?

Psychologists are people. We have grown in a certain culture. And our universities “give the reason” to the culture, although they also give the data. Let's say you need to realize that the data points to one place and the subjects to another. Compare the subjects to check if they are consistent or not.

But many times when people are studying in college, they need to have an approval. Because that's how it is structured. And the approved many times you do not have to compare and think, but to be good at memorizing.

From school, memory is rewarded more than curiosity. Then you start working, but you usually insert yourself in a cabinet, or clinic, that already has its "work system."

The capacity for reflection in our society is not enhanced.

We thank the psychologist Teresa García the interview she has given to Babies and more. We will continue tomorrow analyzing with them behaviors and care that the baby needs to develop a secure attachment.